I imagine the bonds of friendship to be made of glittery bands of gold. Each time an experience is shared with a good friend the bands grow brighter. Sometimes these bands burn so brightly that you can’t help but feel the warmth that connects your two hearts.
Laughter is what I most often seek in the company of a friend. Maybe it is a funny story about the children or husband, or a little bit of wicked gossip that bring the peals of glee out of us.
Sometimes, though, the bonds of friendship sparkle and hiss and you know something is terribly wrong. The blood test was supposed to be fine. That scan was supposed to show nothing. An operation? How long is the recovery? Will you be OK?
As all of the helping hands came out to bring our friend comfort, it soothed me to see that real friendship still plays an important role in a world where relationships seem to so often be built in cyberspace.
As our friend in need became the epicenter, the bonds we all held to her extended to each other. New friendships were made and existing ones were strengthened. There were more excuses to get together and within each visit, laughter and hope squelched the worry that tried to seep through. Her family welcomed us with open arms and shared so many stories of how she became the wonderful woman we knew and loved.
As the months passed, a sense of belief took hold, a conviction that her glorious smile and bright blue eyes would be here until we all grew old together. She and I would often joke about the havoc we would cause in our nursing home together. We needed to act like mature adults now, but later, why not bring back the antics of our youth?
We took her pain for granted, as she so seldom complained. Thanksgiving happened without event, but a few days later a trip to the doctor turned into a five-week hospital stay. As the days continued forward, those bands of gold, which bonded her to friends and family, were like rods of steel. If we all held on with all of our might then maybe we would keep her here and get her home.
Three days before the end, our youngest came to the hospital to see her. At the end of our visit, he asked her to thank her son for helping him get ready for his first wrestling match on Saturday. As she beamed with pride for her own son, she threw her arms open, gave us that gorgeous smile and asked my son for a hug. It was then I knew that she was really saying goodbye.
Those bands of gold will always be there, but for now, they must extend from here to eternity. There is no doubt that she is sitting at the other end of the rainbow, sending golden light and love to all she knew and loved.
Lisa Lupo Talia December 17, 1966 – January 7, 2012